Dateline DFCI
To the Editor:
With consummate eloquence and honesty, writer Christine Cleary captured the experience that cancer brings to individuals and families ["Seeking Smoother Waters," from Fall/Winter 2003 Paths of Progress].
I connected with much of what she wrote, given our family's experience when my 43-year-old daughter Shaun was diagnosed with a glioblastoma. She died 14 months after diagnosis, and she was cared for at home by her parents, brothers, sister, special friends, and fiancé. It is true, as Ms. Cleary wrote, that most friends — however well-intentioned — cannot grasp what this experience means to those going through it. I especially liked what she said about family caregivers finding their own place and doing what best suits them; this was certainly true for us.
Shaun's cancer was devastating, and she was the pulse of our lives for those 14 months. As a family we became more than we ever thought we could be. When Shaun died and it was all over, it was like hitting a brick wall. We had learned so much, our lives had been transformed, and the next steps were not clear. Now, a few years later, we have found our way — but Shaun's illness and death will forever be the central and transcendent experience of our lives.
Sarah Benet
Dorchester, Mass.
Paths of Progress welcomes letters to the editor. They should be sent to Editor, Paths of Progress, Communications Department, Dana-Farber Cancer Institute, 375 Longwood Ave., Boston, MA 02215, or e-mailed to debra_ruder@dfci.harvard.edu. Please include your name, phone number, and postal or e-mail address. Note that letters may be edited for clarity and space purposes.
