The Phams
Family, friendship sustain brain tumor survivor
Mai and Margaret Pham
I met Margaret Pham, 26, and her mother, Mai, at Dana-Farber's Brain Tumor Support Group. At the time, Margaret was a comedienne with the Second City Improv Troupe in Chicago, and a participant in the Improv Olympics. She was also certified in water aerobics, and used to lift watermelons to keep in shape. Our experience as brain tumor survivors offered common ground.
In 2005, Margaret had become dizzy while riding the train and soon after couldn't walk up a few steps to the stage at Second City. Back in her native Boston, her family quickly became a support system with Mai at its core, choosing neurosurgeon Peter Black MD, PhD, at Dana-Farber/Brigham and Women's Cancer Center (DF/BWCC) for Margaret's care. Margaret was diagnosed with a brain tumor, pilocystic astrocytoma, and three surgeries followed. Although this type of tumor is benign, the treatments are similar to those used for cancerous tumors.
Since becoming a DF/BWCC patient, Margaret's outgoing, upbeat personality and her family's support have been extraordinary. I marveled at her ability to make new support group members feel welcome. We easily became friends, and I often accompanied Margaret and her family to medical appointments, eventually being adopted as "Mo Pham." Throughout our conversations I learned that Margaret had attended the University of New Hampshire and double majored in theater and communications, with her family attending and photographing her college performances.
Mother/daughter bond
Since Margaret's diagnosis, Mai has offered steadfast support. "My mom always stressed education and achievement," says Margaret. "She was a homemaker during the day and an art student at Quincy Community Junior College at night. She studied English at a local school and, deeply religious, was always active in her local church. With her as our inspiration, my entire family has finished college and completed post graduate studies."
Mai's late husband was the multilingual Huong Van Pham, a hospital administrator and a colonel in the South Vietnamese Army during the war in Vietnam. In 1975, after the war ended, they moved to Boston because of its reputation as a strong medical community. Huong worked as a laboratory technician at Boston City Hospital and attended Northeastern University, but passed away in 1978, 10 days before Margaret was born. This left Mai to raise her children alone in a foreign land.
Margaret says that during her illness, her mom always found ways to ease her troubles. "When my eyes were weakened from the side effects of radiation, my mom decorated my eye patch with sequins," she recalls. "When the left side of my body weakened, she found a collapsible cane to make it easier for me to walk."
Humor helps
Last year, Dana-Farber's Interpreter Services Department and freelance Vietnamese interpreter David Tran helped the family make complex medical decisions. Serendipitously, Mai knew David from his volunteer work at her church, and they shared many stories about their native Vietnam. David has been able to help them understand the side effects of chemotherapy, including Margaret's concerns about fertility.
Always the comedienne, Margaret sees the funny side of most experiences. Her leg brace was named Chuck. Her tumor became Bucko. When the side effects of her tumor left her eyes askew, her eyeballs quickly became vocalists, Cher and Chaka Kahn. These metaphors made it easier for us to inquire about her health.
Margaret currently receives speech and physical therapy, and plans to graduate from Second City Conservatory. The devotion of this amazing family continues to inspire everyone they meet.
– Maureen Costello
Costello is a brain tumor survivor and member of Dana-Farber's Adult Patient and Family Advisory Council.
